Tonight I will be woken by my husband elbowing me in the ribs, urgently whispering, 'Do you want to know what it is? Do you? Do you?'
As I roll over to punch him in the face, a face illuminated by the glow of his phone and demonically gleeful, I will be stopped in my tracks by the maniacal reeling off of movement standards, weights and reps.
The Open is upon us, people.
And we're just not ready!
We may have had all year but, goddammit, it's just not enough!
If only those double unders were truly in the bag - so good you could guarantee 30 in one go, every time without tripping, rather than the 15 you might manage on a good day, but let's face it 5 on most. If only you'd had a bit more time to practice cleans and jerks or touch-and-go deadlifts. If only you'd actually remembered to work on those hspu or pullups in every warm up, just for a few reps, like you promised yourself you would....if only you were actually ready....if only we had just a few more weeks, days, even...but maybe, just maybe you are actually ready!
Maybe, just maybe, this panicked, sinking feeling is what being ready feels like!
Perhaps that nausea in the pit of your stomach isn't nerves and suicidal anxiety after all but excitement! Perhaps you are bloody ready and this test of what you can do, what your body is capable of, how far you have come so far on your CrossFit journey is just what you've been waiting for!
The point is, you are ready - you are always ready because test aside, these are just workouts and do you know what you do every time you go to the gym? Workouts. That's it.
You will do what you will do and it is going to be way more than you ever believed or imagined you could do before you found CrossFit! And each of the beautifully crafted workouts that bastard Castro dreams up out of his trippy CrossFit head will teach you a lesson. They will take you to places you've never been before and they will change you. And you will come out the other side a better person for it.
CrossFit is hard - it's hard for everyone - it's hard for those guys who come first and it's hard for those guys who come last and it is also just as hard for all those guys who come in between them. So whether you believe yourself to be ready or not ready, it's going to be equally as hard.
And all that means is:
you are ready.